Busy, or Looking Busy? What's Really Taking Your Time
Let me ask you something a little cheeky. Are you busy, or are you looking busy?
A new poll found that 70% of workers believe the most visible people get rewarded over the quiet high performers. Some even admitted to stretching out simple tasks so they'd look busy for longer. It's easy to laugh at that. It's a little harder to look at our own calendars.
Because here's what I see so often with the high achievers I work with. They aren't lazy. Far from it. They're busy all day long. Just not always with the things that would actually move them forward.
The comfortable kind of busy
There's a kind of busy that feels productive and safe. Clearing the inbox. Saying yes to one more meeting. Polishing the presentation for the fourth time. Answering the easy questions first.
All of it looks important. Some of it even is. But it can also be a very respectable way to avoid the one thing that makes our stomach tighten a little: the hard conversation, the bold proposal, the decision we've been circling for weeks, the creative work that might not land.
Those things bring progress. They also bring discomfort. And when we're tired and stretched, our brains are very good at steering us toward whatever feels easier.
The tug-of-war in your head
So what's really taking your time? Often it's not the task at all. It's the tug-of-war of what others will think.
What if they think I'm not ready? What if they say no? What if it's not perfect and people notice?
That inner back-and-forth is exhausting. We can spend an hour, a day, sometimes a whole month going round and round before we take one single step. It quietly drains more time and energy than any to-do list.
And caring so much about how we're perceived makes sense. Many of us learned early that being seen as capable kept us safe, liked and moving up. That part of you has been working hard to protect you. It just doesn't need to be in charge of your calendar.
A kinder way through:
You don't need more discipline here. You need more kindness. Here's a gentle way to break it down:
Notice what you're stepping around. Look at your week and ask: what keeps getting moved? That's usually the one that matters.
Name the worry out loud. "I'm afraid they'll think I'm overstepping." Just saying it often takes away some of its power.
Talk to yourself like you'd talk to a friend. If a friend told you they were stuck, you wouldn't call them weak. You'd say, "Of course this feels hard. You can do hard things." You deserve that same warmth.
Shrink the first step. Not "write the strategy". Just "open a blank page and write three messy bullet points." Fifteen minutes counts.
Let good enough go out the door. Progress loves imperfect action. Polishing is often just fear wearing a nice outfit.
Celebrate the attempt, not only the outcome. You did the uncomfortable thing. That deserves a little recognition, from you.
When you set the tone for others
If you lead people, your team is watching what you celebrate. If the late-night emails and full calendars get the praise, that's what you'll get more of. If you name the brave, quiet progress (the honest conversation, the first draft shared early), you give everyone permission to do the meaningful work, discomfort and all.
What would change?
Imagine the energy you'd get back if you spent a little less time wondering what others think, and a little more doing the thing that matters to you. Not perfectly. Just bravely, and kindly.
So, what's really taking your time this week?
Let's untangle it together
If you're a high achiever who's tired of being busy without feeling like you're moving forward, I'd love to help. Together we can look at what's holding you back, gently, and find a way of working that feels lighter and a lot more like you.
Source: "Performative busyness": New workplace trend blamed on rewarding visibility more, HR Director, October 12, 2026 (MyPerfectResume poll).
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